At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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