How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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