I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize