alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
