I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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