how do flat chested girls get laid?
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
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