Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Randomize
