we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
