Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
