handjob tips. give me some.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
