you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
