Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
