never play flip cup with pint glasses
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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