I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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