Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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