so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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