if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize