If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
