Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
