You were right. It hurts to walk today.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Randomize
