she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Redeem this text for a blowjob
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Randomize
