Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
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