I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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