Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
