Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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