You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
