So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
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So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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