Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
