you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
