i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
