2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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