Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
