So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
