I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
