i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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