this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize
