but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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