If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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