No awkward lesbian experiences without me
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.