it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'