We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
