I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
