Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
