i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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