Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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