Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I supernannyed him into submission
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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