with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
