this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
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