i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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