Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
