Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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