If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Randomize
