who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
